{"id":24069,"date":"2025-07-01T14:35:00","date_gmt":"2025-07-01T12:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stadtsprachen.de\/de\/?post_type=stsp_text&p=24069"},"modified":"2025-07-03T13:24:07","modified_gmt":"2025-07-03T11:24:07","slug":"tessa-sinclair-scott","status":"publish","type":"stsp_text","link":"https:\/\/stadtsprachen.de\/de\/text\/tessa-sinclair-scott\/","title":{"rendered":"Poems"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

We are old, but we are waiting<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hello liebe Frau, most esteemed of all, you are too late!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Frist has been gefressen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O Herr, what ever could you mean, by being so mean?

Why ever do you squash my fingers in your desk so,

causing my scarlet blood to flow?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Liebe Frau, you are mistaken, I merely wish to help you

claim your own identity \u2014 so, please explain your life

on this form, in triplicate, here, here, and here.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O Herr, my life, thrice explained, as follows: I sell apples in a kiosk

I place the reddest, juiciest apples in brown bags, twist them

closed with a flourish. When day drains away I hang a mirror-ball<\/p>\n\n\n\n

in the sky and under this crazed bulb I sashay the long white cloud path

home, when I tire, hands hand me sandwiches and bottles of water, voices

tell me \u2014 keep going, we are waiting for your return \u2014 we are old but we

are waiting<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The limits of my bank account
are the limits of my world<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a limit to my patience.

I find it in the toolbox scrabbling through string and rubber bands for wire

every time the fuses blow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a limit to my dignity.

I find it trying to inhabit my kitchen like a domestic goddess on an Aldi

budget, decanting nuts into glass jars \u2014 it\u2019s not about storage, baby, it\u2019s

about hiding the packagings of poorness from myself,

it\u2019s the stretch, the eke.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a limit to my composure.

I find it when my tall pale son kisses his sick cat\u2019s head, turns from the

needle tinting pink with heart blood, her little muscle stops beating, soul

flies out, sits like a shadow on my shoulders, from where she caterwauls \u2014

if only you could\u2019ve paid the vet bill, I wouldn\u2019t have to haunt you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a limit to my denial.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I find it when my fingers are sliced by the latest reminder letter and

I find one million ways not to pay, just yet \u2014 and a good day is when I

crack open the letter box to find it shining, clean, empty.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Schmerzmittel<\/strong>

The one thing I can remember

is the number to call the medics

who wrap me in a silver blanket against January

walk me down three flights & ask questions

to check I am still compos mentis.

The ambulance is warm

I leak amniotic fluid under my crinkly cape

giant ballooning in and out, I try the breathing

under blink-on, blink-off snow light

keep losing count.

Driving through the night I search for German words

from the language field of birthdddddddddd<\/mark>find Schmerzmittel<\/em>

turns out, while good for headaches, is inadequate

for who I have become, for now I am a pin head stuck into my own effigy

on a green mattress which rolls away in a wide shore each side of me \u2014 my

prepared wie sieht’s aus mit Schmerzmittel <\/em>rolls away to the corner of the

room, heavy marbles dropped one by one into a sea of Germanddddd<\/mark>and

efficient nursesddddd<\/mark>the bed yawns open it sucks me down to where between

gales is only

breath and pain „avoured backwash, it turns out,

an introvert birthing is no longer small of sound:

I am birthing another whole language

ddddd<\/mark>dd<\/mark>too tired to push\/lights too bright\/I say to myself

I feel quite demoralized<\/em>, and on an after breath & a flip of blood

you slip free and are delivered, small parcel with head tucked in,

your sly, close-eye smile

<\/p>\n\n\n\n




<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

We are old, but we are waiting Hello liebe Frau, most esteemed of all, you are too late! The Frist has been gefressen. O Herr, what ever could you mean, by being so mean? Why ever do you squash my fingers in your desk so, causing my scarlet blood to flow? Liebe Frau, you are […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":24012,"template":"","categories":[63,11],"class_list":["post-24069","stsp_text","type-stsp_text","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-issue-32","category-lyrik"],"yoast_head":"\nPoems - stadtsprachen<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/stadtsprachen.de\/de\/text\/tessa-sinclair-scott\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"de_DE\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale:alternate\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Poems - stadtsprachen\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"We are old, but we are waiting Hello liebe Frau, most esteemed of all, you are too late! The Frist has been gefressen. O Herr, what ever could you mean, by being so mean? 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