I like women. One of them is
\neven my wife. She has all the strengths
\nand weaknesses of women, both of which I admire equally.
\nWe try to communicate and that causes problems.
\nOccasionally, whenever I\u2019m not squeezed between slices
\nof darkness, whenever I\u2019m not wondering if I\u2019ll
\never write again, we have sex.
\nSince we\u2019re married, we have sex the way we imagine
\nother married people do.
\nAs casually as possible and without the awkward
\nforeplay. In this respect, as in most others,
\nwe have no examples. No models. No parents.
\nThis gives us pleasure. We\u2019re happy we don\u2019t know
\nhow our parents had sex. In this respect all of us
\nwho\u2019ve had parents are somewhat alike. Otherwise
\nwe\u2019re quite different. Some men, for instance, give
\nother men or other women a hard time,
\nsome women give other men a hard time,
\nor other women, or everyone at once.
\nOccasionally, alas, this holds for me, too. And I feel bad.
\nUnbelievably bad. I call people up and apologize
\nfor yesterday. Sorry, my mind was
\npreoccupied, my heart in my throat, my guts in an uproar.
\nSharp canine fangs in my clenched fist. Dust
\nstinging my lungs. I don\u2019t want to be a man
\nwho gives his wife a hard time. I suspect it\u2019s no mistake for me
\nto say she doesn\u2019t want that, either.
\nBut none of this is to say there aren\u2019t also some men
\nthat I like. My brother, for instance,
\nwas one of them. He helped me
\nwhen I was having trouble with some woman.
\nHe listened to me without saying a word. He also listened
\nwithout saying a word when he was dying.
\nAnd I couldn\u2019t help him. I don\u2019t know
\nif I was ever able to help him with anything
\nas much as he helped me
\narrange the furniture, for instance.
\nAs he lay motionless in his bed
\nin the hospital I sadly explained what
\nprogress I had made assembling my new bicycle.
\nHe listened without saying a word, but I think he didn\u2019t remember what I was talking about.
\nI changed the subject. Do you remember
\nthat episode of this or that series?
\nMy brother nods absently. Where in his sleep the hero
\ndreams his whole life away as somebody
\nelse? His favorite episode!
\nWhich of us now is dreaming his life
\naway as somebody else?
\nI don\u2019t know why some of us live
\nour lives as though this was somebody
\nelse\u2019s life. That\u2019s why I don\u2019t make lists
\nof my favorite songs, people, movies or books.
\nI wouldn\u2019t be able to name my favorite
\nseries. And I don\u2019t know why some people
\nare always so all-fired uptight that I get
\nuptight as well and start giving my wife a hard time
\nand everything turns stupid and hopeless and
\nsomehow quite ordinary. I\u2019m glad
\nI at least know which episode of this or that
\nseries was my brother\u2019s favorite.
\nWhat we choose loses its value. And even if
\nI believed in favorite things, I still wouldn\u2019t know
\nhow to choose them the way that summer
\nright before going back to my valley on the very first try
\nI managed once and for all to choose
\nmy one and only long-suffering wife.<\/p>\n
<\/p>\n
Aus dem Slowenischen von Michael Biggins<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I like women. One of them is even my wife. She has all the strengths and weaknesses of women, both of which I admire equally. We try to communicate and that causes problems. Occasionally, whenever I\u2019m not squeezed between slices of darkness, whenever I\u2019m not wondering if I\u2019ll ever write again, we have sex. Since […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"featured_media":5810,"template":"","categories":[27,11],"class_list":["post-3476","stsp_text","type-stsp_text","status-publish","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-issue-4","category-lyrik"],"yoast_head":"\n